


With Love, The Doctor

by DarkPhoenix1578



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Angst, Canon Divergence, Canonical Regeneration, F/M, Goodbyes, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Pre-Regeneration, Reunion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-27
Updated: 2015-01-27
Packaged: 2018-03-09 09:12:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3244196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkPhoenix1578/pseuds/DarkPhoenix1578
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With the Doctor's regeneration inevitably looming in the near future, the Time Lord decides to visit one last time with Rose Tyler and say the three words he had meant to say all along.</p>
            </blockquote>





	With Love, The Doctor

_He will knock four times._ That was what he had been told. And the Doctor couldn't deny it, even if he had first thought he could - he was going to die.

The Time Lord sunk into the captain's seat, shoulder hunched and eyebrows furrowed. It wasn't fair; he didn't want to go. Not if there were still planets to see, civilizations to save, monsters to defeat. All that was left waiting for him. Well, not exactly _him_ anyways, but the future him; the future Doctor.

For a moment, he very much considered taking the TARDIS and continuing to travel, ignoring his inevitable doom and the consequences of ignoring it. Ignoring the ignoring...it sounded quite wonderful, actually. Deep down inside his two hearts, though, the Doctor knew that wasn't possible. He would have to come face to face with fate eventually. He couldn't run forever.

_Perhaps I could escape._ But where? Where could he escape without fate trailing behind him, stalking, waiting for its moment to pounce.

With a growl of frustration and anger, the Doctor jumped up and began pacing the console room. He felt the TARDIS hum gently in his mind. "I-I cannot just... _willingly_ walk straight into my death!" he exclaimed, running his fingers through his hair. Big hair. The Doctor paused for a moment, suddenly struck with a feeling of fear and grief that his next incarnation will have very, not big hair. He shook the thought off.

"It's not _fair!"_ the Doctor shouted. He placed his arms on the console and leaned into it. Breathing heavily, he whispered, "There's no where else to run. I can't...can't just escape it like that." He turned around so his back was against the console. "Unless I could somehow...somehow..." The Doctor's eyes widened. "Pop into another universe." Almost immediately, the image of Rose snapped before his eyes.

His hearts twisted. She would never know. She'd think he was the same old man, running across the stars and saving everyone's lives. Of course, he did leave her with the counterpart of himself but...might it be even slightly possible to see her just one more time, kiss her hair one more time, talk to her _one more time?_

The sensible, logical part of him was waving its hand in front of his face to try and divert himself from this possibly catastrophic idea. The other side however, the part that wanted and needed Rose so badly, won over. "If I'm going to die," the Doctor spoke quietly. "Then I'm going to make myself the happiest man in the Universe first."

* * *

Rose stared at the tombstone for perhaps far too long. He had not been, after all, _her_ Doctor. Rose placed a hand on her mouth to hold back the wretched, familiar sobs. It had only been five years since the Doctor left, and already his Clone had deceased. The ironic thing was, however, that despite being human, everything else about the Clone had been so Doctor...which, unfortunately, included him being stubborn in trying to save herself and others.

_Always the dramatic hero._ Rose smiled a little.

She read the passage on the tombstone once more: _In memory of the Doctor._ Perhaps it wasn't the most fitting message, but he had been the Doctor, too...it was only fair she wrote something with _Doctor_ in it. But somehow, Rose felt it spoke more about _her_ Doctor, her time traveling alien, than the human version.

"Rose, hon, are you alright over there?"

Rose turned around to see her mum staring worriedly over at her near the car. Rose smiled to hide her frown and merely nodded. She turned back to the grave, blew it one, final kiss, and than slowly walked back to the car.

* * *

**_Two days later_ **

Rose jumped ten feet in the air when she heard a resounding crash in her backyard. "Bloody hell!" she choked over her morning toast. Swallowing the rest down and chugging her orange juice, she raced over to one of her mum's windows to see what had made all that racket. She saw nothing.

_Strange._ She thought as she ran and thrust open the apartment door. She ran down the several flights of stairs, jumping over a couple and almost spraining her ankle on some rather sharp turns. She burst out of the apartment builing, holding her hand to block out the sunlight streaming into her face. Except that it wasn't sunlight. It looked like-

Rose screamed and ducked for cover as a sudden wave of energy hurled her away. She was tossed yards away from where she had been standing and fell onto a patch of grass with a _thump._ Rose stayed perfectly still, terrified out of her wits. _What the hell...?_

When all the rumbling and the flashes of energy had passed, Rose cautiously picked herself off the ground, glancing around warily. "Who caused that?" she called out uncertaintly. Nothing but the trees, the birds, and the wind answered her. "Weird," she muttered under her breath. "They didn't seem affected by that at all."

Rose stood up, keeping her body tensed up, just in case she needed to run. Which, of course, she did, because seconds later, a familiar blue box came crashing out of the vortex and hurtled straight towards her. Rose yelped and dashed to the side just in time for the TARDIS to come crashing gracelessly to the ground. And there it remained as Rose quickly stood up again, gawking.

The doors to the TARDIS opened and out came the Doctor, with smoke trailing behind him. He didn't see her, as she was standing to the side. He coughed and spluttered, closing the doors behind him. "Sorry, ol' girl; probably didn't like that at all, did you?"

It was _him._ All Rose wanted to do right now was weep. Instead, she crossed her arms over her chest and put on her best irritated face. "Well, yeah, you would think, since you obviously forced her into a parallel world." The Doctor spun around, caught by surprise. Rose almost smiled. "So, yeah, I would think that would give her just _a bit_ of indigestion."

She fell silent and the two stared at each other for a moment. And then Rose found herself hugging a whole bunch of Doctor. "Rose Tyler," he whispered in her ear. _How I've missed that,_ she thought. "Oh, how I have missed you." A sudden anger sparked in Rose and she pulled away, glaring at him.

"Yeah, it didn't seem so obvious the last time we saw each other." she snapped at him, crossing her arms as if to protect what shards where left of her heart.

The Doctor frowned as understanding poked through his head. "I'm sorry, Rose - I thought it was for the best."

"You thought it was _for the best!"_ Rose shouted. "Because it doesn't need saying? Or because somehow you knew that he'd eventually die and you'd just come back and chat and hug me like nothing ever happened?"

The Doctor's expression tightened. "He's dead?"

"Yes, of course he's dead." Rose felt her conviction slowly draining out of her. "He died saving me...just as you would of. He was you through and through, excluding him being human."

The Doctor shook his head and pinched his nose. "Rose, I am so sorry; I never knew that would happen. I have actually come here for an even...more darker reason."

Rose frowned at him. She glanced back at her mum's apartment; her mum being at work, no one would really much care if she brought the Doctor into her apartment. Except maybe nosy neighbors. "How about we talk about it inside? Mum's at work; she would never even know."

The Doctor smirked. "It would be just her to slap me for leaving you then..." He mock choked. "Snogging me for coming back."

Rose laughed. "Yeah, it would. C'mon."

* * *

The Doctor practically waltzed inside of the apartment, taking a grand look at everything. "It all seems so...the same. Like nothing's changed."

"That's because it hasn't." Rose replied. "Would you like tea?"

The Doctor stared at her for a moment, a sudden darkness coming over his eyes. "No, thank you." he said quietly. "I don't have much time to explain this all."

Rose's heart cracked. "You...you aren't staying?"

The Doctor gazed sorrowfully at her. "No. I can't. Certain things have to happen, and it all involves me."

The Doctor seated himself on one of the couches, leaning back and staring almost depressedly out the window. Rose immediately sat next to him. "Doctor, are you...you seem...I don't know..."

"Rose Tyler." he whispered, pain jerking his hearts. "I was given a prophecy. This woman I met not too long ago, one I was saving...she said he would knock four times. She told me to be careful."

Rose listened intently, fear suddenly gripping her. "Who is he?"

"The Master." the Doctor answered. "At least, I think. He's a Time Lord, like me...but he kills people. Or corrupts them...makes them like him. And he has these 'drums' inside his head that go like this."

He laid a hand on the table and tapped his finger - one two three four, one two three four.

"Four knocks." Rose said. And suddenly, without any other clues, she understood. "Doctor." she said softly. "You don't have to leave. You don't have to face him. You don't have to be brave every day."

The Doctor laughed humorlessly. "That's just it, Rose. I don't know the dangers that the other Universe may be facing...I can't let them suffer. Like you said before, I'm very...me."

A tear slid down Rose's cheek. "I don't want you to...you'll die."

The Doctor stared at her again, reaching out with his thumb to brush the tear away. "Look at you," he whispered tenderly. "So alive...still living. Still going on, day after day. Don't use me as the definition of bravery, Rose...look at yourself."

Rose tried to glare at him, but it faltered at the man's gentle gaze. "Doctor." she murmured, putting her hand over his and holding it against her cheek. "...Please...be careful. Try to regenerate instead of just dying, because I will feel much better if there is still a Doctor out there in another universe. Still saving, still living..."

The Doctor smiled weakly. "I promise you, Rose, that I will try."

For a few minutes, Rose sat curled up next to the Doctor, her head leaned up against his chest with his hand caressing her cheek. The Doctor spoke up again.

"Rose. There is something I have meant to say to you from the very start. Something I should have said so long ago, when we were happier." Rose squeezed her eyes shut, willing herself not to cry. "Rose Marion Tyler...I love you. I have always loved. And as long as I live, through all my regenerations, you will always be loved...and always remembered."

Rose couldn't stand it anymore. She sobbed. She wept into the Doctor's suit, clutching at his shoulders. The Doctor provided a warm, protective arm around her waist and gently kissed her hair. Rose glared up at him. "You call that a kiss?" she complained. The Doctor smiled and proceeded to place a warm kiss on her lips. The same warmth spread from her lips to the rest of her body.

They spent the next few minutes like this, caressing and holding each other like it would be the last time they could do so - because it was. In the distance, they both heard the distant groan of the TARDIS. "I have to go, Rose." he said to her.

Rose nodded her head in compliance. "Promise...you'll remember me. I can't make you love me when you regenerate, but please...I don't want to be forgotten."

"I promise." The Doctor stood up, a pained expression on his face. "As long as I live this incarnation, Rose, I shall love you. And as long as I live in my future incarnations, I will always remember you. You will always hold a special place in my hearts, Rose. Both of them."

Rose smiled, teary eyed. "I love you, Doctor.

"I love you, too, Rose Tyler."

She watched him exit the apartment, closing the door behind. In a fit of emotion, she jumped from the couch and looked out the window. She could see the Doctor trudging towards the TARDIS, key in hand. He opened the doors and placed one foot inside. But then he turned and looked straight up at him. He blew her a kiss and Rose blew him one, too. The doors were closed behind him and she watched as the TARDIS slowly dematerialized out of her universe.

Tears trickled down her face, despite the happy smile. _Goodbye, Doctor._


End file.
